“Just be yourself!” I used to cringe when I heard that phrase. “How do I do that?,” I thought. But over the years, little by little, through each interaction and relationship, I am finding my own answer.
I learn to be myself by examining the fears that drive me to act otherwise. I ask, “Why do I say and do the things I don’t want to, and not say and not do those I do?”
The motive for this phony behavior is born of a false notion that it will get me what I want and need, coupled with the fear that following my truth will yield the opposite.
Underlying this fear is a lack of trust that I am enough just as I am. When I see myself as inadequate, I seek outside validation and modify my behavior from what is natural in an attempt to manipulate others into giving me what I think I need. The tragedy is that even if I succeed in convincing others to regard me in a certain light, what they are validating is a false persona, rather than the real me. This not only leaves me wanting, but also feeling like a fraud.
These machinations stem from a distrust in the Universe and the misperception that I have the ability to manipulate it into something that it is not. How could I possibly change something from what it is into what it isn’t?
The remedy is discernment, recognizing the false as false, and embracing the simple reality that I am as I am and all else is as it is. From this pure recognition arises Love.
I see a benevolent Universe that supports and guides me and everyone else always and everywhere. I trust the Universe. This trust gives me the courage to “just be myself” and allow everyone else to do the same.